Anonymous
sent a message
hi I hope you’re okay
Im alive
sometimes it’s easier to let someone hate you
then to let them watch you slowly deteriorate
some say its hard to let someone go
but I think its harder to be let gone
not a day goes past i dont think of you
thats why i cant stand to let this storm affect you too
the usual marriage vows include till death do us part
but whos to say thatl be a long time if you’re on the verge of saying goodbye
it sucks knowing youre the only one who’ll understand me
if only i understood myself to figure this all out
im not suicidal im just thinking of the long term
whats in store for someone whos let time pass them by
its almost feels like ive outlived my time here
life keeps giving me signs to give up and i dont know how much longer i can disagree with it
ill keep living but it doesnt mean ill be happy with it
i just cant bare the image of seeing my parents witness my passing
this fucking sucks, pass me another lie so i can keep going
run. 07:58PM
then they didn’t like where we were. the walls kept us inside to keep us safe. but all we wanted was to go outside, even if it was just in the backyard. just for a little bit. 30 minutes was all that we needed. we ran, and hid, just to feel the grass. that was all we wanted. we weren’t out to burn the trees or tag the walls, we just wanted to see the green of the world smile back at us. It was too much for them. just a glimpse was enough for them. they tied us up and left us with only the mind we had to see the trees again. nothing could take that away. nothing will take that away. nothing but hope floated in the sea of doubt and tears they poured in under the bedroom door. they gave us a reason to leave. they kept proving to us that the outside was all we wanted, all by telling us not to go outside.
the trees.
the trees.
the trees.
the flowers.
the flowers.
the flowers.
taller and taller and taller, every month, every week, every night, every day.
hope couldn’t die. the flowers couldn’t die. they cant die.
this was all we had now. this is all we have. and its perfect.
they warned us of imperfection, when all we could see was the beauty of it.
they no longer have the strength to shackle us. we opened the doors and the sun blinded our eyes. no more peaking over the walls to see the green. it was all there in front of us.
run.
feel the grass on the bottom of your feet, look at the flowers, look, dont stop running. its all here.
its all here.
we’re nearly there, babygirl.
don’t stop running.
don’t stop thinking about the flowers in the backyard.
I miss you.
brah fuck it im just die